Brain Randoms

It's been a busy couple of weeks. Plenty of things to say just not the time to say it. OR not the RIGHT time to say it. Believe it or not I've been holding my tongue quite a bit lately. I've found it interesting to step back & see how things play out. People are amusing.

So we are in week 3 of cheerleading & is it horrible that I cannot wait for it to be over? It's not the actual cheerleading, it's more the commitment that brings the waves of dread. I don't like that it's a requirement in my life, I have to go to games, I have to go to practice. Some days I don't want to put forth the effort. I don't want yet another thing on my list to do :oP Sounds lazy I'm sure but in reality it's simply a brain overload. Stress equals a fried brain which leads to a difficult state of mind for me: mania - & that leads me to my next topic.

I've known my downward spiral was coming. I'd pushed it away for months, ignored it, fought it, denied it's entrance into my world. But it simply becomes inevitable. My episodes recur every 2 years or so. I lasted 3 years this time. I hate to call it an "episode" because it wasn't a full blown manic depressive state. It's changed up on me a bit. In fact it's duration was much shorter than I anticipated. But the thoughts I had no control over. & when it was all over it was like someone went into my head flipped a switch while I was sleeping & I was perfectly fine the next morning. While I find that amazing, it also worries me. It was unexpected and different than what I'm used to. So I'm not complaining but I'm keeping a close watch on my mental state, noting the changes & hopeful that possibly this med-free treatment may be working :o)

& since I haven't mentioned it lately - deployments suck! LOL! We're 12 wks in people. Some days that 12 wks feels like an eternity & other days it's like he just left. I'm so ready to have my husband home. It's crazy to type it but we thrive when we're with each other. In 10 days we will have been married for 11 years. I can't believe it. & don't worry there will be a sappy, love-filled post all about it :oP

So I've currently had my fill of updating my blog. I'll be posting some recipes, hopefully, this week. Maybe some photos since it's warming up here in the south. Speaking of warm....I tanned today!! Ah how I miss it when I've been away from those UV rays for too long lol! Okay I'm done now. :oP