Another Glimpse of Heaven hehehe!

This is my Apple Tart Pizza. I caught a similar recipe online the other day & decided to make it MY way :o)


Pick up some frozen pastry dough at the grocery store. Unfold it & let it lay out while you do the following:

Core your apples, cut them in half, & slice them very thin. How many apples you may ask, well I used 3 small ones & it was more than enough to cover my pastry dough. Throw your apple slices into a bowl with some brown sugar.



Make sure they are well coated. YUM! Let them set while you hunt out your pans for your pastry dough & preheat your oven to 350 degrees.



Most pastry dough comes either folded in half or in thirds. Unfold it, cut in half, thirds, or roll it out into a circle like I did - I wanted something different, I dont like to conform :oP


Throw your apples onto your dough. Be wary of how much you throw on, if it's too much your dough wont bake well, been there done that. You dont want the apples to weigh your lovely pastry down. If you're OCD you can line your apples up in a cute little overlapping row right in the center of dough. Then pop it in the oven for about 20 minutes.



Once finished you can top with whatever you like. I used Edy's Caramel Delight ice cream because it is absolutely divine. Powdered sugar, cinnamon, other ice cream flavors will all do quite nicely. Feel free to experiment!

Voila! You have another glimpse of heaven. It is delicious no matter how you decide to make it. And the worst part of the whole deal is cutting up those slippery lil apples. I despise slicing apples but it's SO worth it!

Oh & dont mind my beautiful paperware, I also despise washing dishes :oP

Enjoy!

Loveliness

I babysat a particular pup today, her name is Ruckus. She's your typical puppy, bouncy, playful, into everything, terrorizes the cats, etc. She also liked giving Devlan kisses.



But as the hour passed I noticed something strange.



She was only giving him kisses when he was talking. She wanted him to be quiet. She wanted him to stop calling her name incessantly for minutes on end.



Wonder if that would work for me? I hear "mama" at least 100 times a day....


I love these lil notes from my sweetie. He always leaves me one on our bed right before he leaves again *sigh* (I'm full of sighs this week :oP)



He's also a list maker. So on his lists I always write something like "Love Bree a lot" & he always responds with something sweet.

I love him & his love makes me sigh too ♥

Have a wonderful evening.

*sigh*

Can I please just take a minute to breathe today?


It has been a busy morning & I havent even left the house to run some errands yet....


Cleaning, downloading pictures, looking at next week on my calendar, boy have I over sheduled myself next week... Answering the million and one calls I've recieved this morning, going through mail, bills, missed calls, voicemails, wracking my brain for answers to questions that I do not have, & in the midst of all that I realize that the next big holiday coming up I will be spending with my husband.


FINALLY! You see last year I spent July 4th with people that I didnt know & few that I did. July 4th is a holiday that Dave & I enjoy very much. Kissing him under the fireworks is always amazing. This year we won't be apart. In fact the last holiday we spent together was Halloween. Halloween was completely ruined by the fact that he had to be on a plane back to Iraq the next morning. Iraq - Ugh! So you see this is very exciting news for me YAY!


Then I realized that after that August will be here - My Birthday!! By then we should be at Stewart, the kids settled into school, & the house unpacked. Blue October is playing at the House of Blues in Myrtle Beach, only one of my favorite bands of all time, on August 22nd. I'd love to go *cough*hint hint*cough* It'd be a wonderful birthday present *cough*hint hint*cough*


Next week, oh no, not next week.... lets see Pros & Cons
Pro -it's one more week closer to Dave coming home & our move to Stewart
Con -My lil man Camden is a year older, 5. Wow how time flies by....
Pro -My kitty Jetts is getting spayed, no more of that annoying midnight meowing
Con -I have yet to plan any birthday celebrations
Pro -It's the kids last full week of school
Con - It's the kids last full week of school


It's going to be a busy week, there's conferences at school, vet visits & bills, grocery shopping, errand running, birthdays & parties, & at some point I have to shower, dress myself & children, feed us, bathe them, somehow pull out of my butt the magic that makes me a proficient mother & wife.


*SIGH*

Excitement on the Streets

There was a house fire on our street today, just 2 houses down from ours. No one was hurt but we were all worried. The older couple who live there are on oxygen so there's oxygen tanks sitting around in their house - Scary! But luckily the fire department responded quickly.





Not much outside damage to the house but from what we were told the inside is pretty bad. I didnt get any shots of the smoke rolling out. I was more concerned that everyone got out safely, I didn't think to grab my camera - SEE! My camera's not ALWAYS attached to me! Red Cross Disaster Relief showed up to help them out & their family was there of course.





After everything was under control I let the kids go out to have a look & talk to the firemen. It was definately an educational experience for them. It was also good for them to see how the community comes together to help out each other. & they ended their spontaneous 20 question ramble to the firemen & received their Junior Firefighter helmets along with the other kids on our street.


So there you have it, a neighbor's misfortune turned into a learning experience for all. Thankfully no one was hurt & our neighbors are being provided for. God was lookin' out for us today.

Likes & Dislikes

I adore cupcakes. Pink puffy heart them doesn't even skim the surface of how I feel about these cupcakes. Light & fluffy with just the right amount of creamy icing, melt in your mouth kind of heaven *sigh* I need them desperately, my thighs probably not so much but I'll over look that. Cupcakes make everything right in the world *sigh again* lol!


I do not adore articles like this one: http://omg.yahoo.com/blogs/goddess/melissa-joan-hart-reveals-her-bikini-body/231?nc Now dont get me wrong if you want to lose weight to be healthy that is perfectly fine but the article says she weighs 113 pounds!! A 30 something year old woman who has given birth to 2 children should NOT weigh the same as a young teen girl! She lost 42 pounds over a 14 month regiment, which really is pretty darn good. That puts her at 155lbs over a year ago. She's the same height as me(5'2") so that means that anything over 130 is labeled overweight. I sit comfortably at 120lbs. I think I look good at this weight, it's not too much & it's not too little for my frame. Even now I look at myself in pictures & see a lollipop head on a skinny body so sometimes I think a few extra pounds of muscle probably wouldnt hurt me. On my frame going from 120 to 113 would make a tremendous difference.


Melissa's "friend" Jaime Pressley says:

"She finally took the time to take care of herself. I'm blown away by how amazing she looks."

Um, HELLO!!! 113 lbs isn't taking care of yourself, that's being ridiculous! On the magazine cover she looks great but I mean c'mon they airbrush everything. I don't know. I was a wee bit irritated about it all. It's not my business. I normally don't pay attention to such things, most of it's crap anyway. But I just get tired of the media dictating what's acceptable for a woman's body & what isn't. So there :oP


Likes: Cupcakes
Dislikes: Our Media Dictatorship

Memorial Day - Happy or No?

I know that a lot of people get caught up in the goings on of Memorial Day. There's barbeques, fireworks, family gatherings, & drinking - basically having a good time. & that's alright but try to remember what the day is really supposed to be about. It's about remembering those who have died for our freedoms. Now I'm not going to give you an entire lecture on how it should be celebrated with a somberness. I, too, am grilling with my family today but we also will remember & talk about those who have fallen & what their sacrifice means to us. My kids will participate in the conversation & understand what it is exactly that we are memorializing this day.


I don't think I ever fully understood what that meant until my husband was deployed. Last Memorial Day 2008 we were remembering 2 fallen soldiers from my husbands unit, 2 men that gave their lives just a month before. The most heartbreaking day of my life during that deployment, a friend lost her husband, it could have just as easily been mine. & Dave lost a friend, I'm reminded of this every time I look at the bracelet on his wrist, it never comes off.

I want to leave you with the words spoken by Maj. Gen. Jeffery Hammond, the commanding general of the 4th Inf. Div., at the last memorial dedication for the 4th Inf. Div. at Fort Hood on May 21st. 112 men & 1 woman gave their lives during their 15-month deployment in Iraq.


“Many questions may exist about the sacrifices made by our 113 heroes,” said Hammond . “I don’t have all the answers, but I know a few things – they stood to be counted when their nation called. They loved their country, their Families and their fellow Soldiers. They were incredibly giving, to each other and to the people of Iraq . They wanted to make a difference – and did. They represent the best of what our nation has to offer. Always remember this – some are content to simply enjoy the freedoms of this great country – others choose to protect that freedom – our 113 heroes whose name is etched on our wall are men and women of action, not just words. They entered the field of battle to make a difference rather than straddling the sidelines offering only opinions,” said Hammond .
As we move forward today, let’s remember these men and women served and died for us to live in freedom,” said Hammond . “They wanted their children and our children to grow up and live in safety, not fear. So as we honor their memories today, let their legacy of hope live through all of us.

“Let’s follow the example they set for us. Let’s earn what they have given us. Let’s love more and love better,” concluded Hammond.

I read this morning that Defense Secretary Robert M. Gates has stated it could take 2-4 years before the Afghan National Army is ready to take over their own operations. That means another 4 years of our men & women dying. While one war is coming to an end another is just really beginning. More sacrifices will be made, more names added to memorial walls.


So while we go on about our celebrations today & on with our lives this week & weeks after, lets remember Maj. Gen. Hammond's words. Let's be men & women of action, prove that you are worthy of the sacrifices made by all the fallen over hundreds of years.

I hope you all have a splendid day.



This post is dedicated to:


CPT Andrew R. Pearson
SPC Ronald J. Tucker

The Days Roll By

So yesterday I was quite busy. You see I taught the babe how to drive. Of course he couldn't reach the pedals but he had an awesome time steering. Some days I don't want to drive so I figure teaching him now will come in handy.





I'm only joking. What actually happened was he climbed up in my seat. I asked if he was driving today. He said Yep. So I got in on the passenger side. I figured after a few minutes he'd get the idea that he's too short to manage the pedals & steering at the same time. He didn't give it up. He's a determined little man. So instead of making him mad by telling him he CAN'T drive(Never tell him he CAN'T do anything, it's bad juju) I decided to let him steer(with my help of course, silly) while I drove around our driveway. That seemed to suffice for now.



After our driving lesson we headed out to pick up some ingredients to make homemade bread YUM! This is what it looked like during the process.



Now you're probably asking Bree where's the baked bread picture. Well it was so delicious that it didn't last long enough to take an after shot. Seriously. We devoured it. Good as Gone. :o) Sorry.


I did do something productive today. I cleaned out part of the kids room. Categorized some things for when it comes time to pack. I stayed pretty busy so I missed my afternoon nap. So I made up for it after I picked up the kids from school. YAY Me!





Now if you'll notice in the picture above, I'm not alone in my napping. I never am. Apparently I am so loved that when I lie down on the couch to rest my entire animal posse must join me. Glitch is the kitty closest to my head with her little paws outstretched towards me. Jetts is sleeping next to Glitch. Jetts normally sleeps besides me on my bed at night ♥ You may not be able to tell but Sara has found a comfy spot behind my knees. This is where she normally sleeps or if I'm at the computer then she's curled up under my feet. & Melvin pup is beneath me on the floor, snoring away.





So you see when I lie down to nap so does everyone else except the kids. I did manage to rouse myself long enough to make chicken enchiladas for supper & bake some cupcakes. I pink puffy heart cupcakes :o)


What did YOU do today?

Mania

This is one of those "serious" posts. You see when I clean, I think...a lot. You may also find out a thing or two about me that may be TMI. So we'll just hop right into it :o)


I'm pretty sure I've been a manic depressive(bipolar) my entire life. I can be incredibly moody. I remember being a little girl & trying to figure out why I was sad all the time. Yet there are pictures & video of me at the same age, happy, laughing, everything a little girl should be. The older I got the worse my episodes were. As a teenager I was flighty. I couldn't wait to get away, not from my family but from my life at the time. I just knew there was something greater out there for me. My depression became a regular every day emotion for me, for weeks sometimes months at a time. Then one day I'd wake up & be perfectly happy, couldn't imagine my life being any better. This was the cycle my life had taken on. Every episode was a little worse, lasted a little longer.


Now you see my happiness wasn't just the happy-go-lucky kind. It was Life's a Party, throw caution to the wind. I drank with friends, I popped pills, I did things that now I realize were rash & dangerous. This was a time in my life where I hid a lot. My family never knew a thing was going on. Then I met David. I cant say it was love at first sight. I can tell you that when I saw him I knew my life was going to change. Everything in my body screamed this is your destiny. Weird, I know but it happened. From there on out I strove to be someone he would be proud of. We got married, had children, and lived our life. Yet that manic side of myself was always there, an undercurrent of emotion, something I tried to hide.


My breaking point:

I was constantly at my wits end. I felt like I was going crazy. I was snapping at my children who were just 3 & 1 at the time. I flipped out one day in front of my kids. I threw a tantrum in the kitchen, jumping up & down, screaming over some minor argument with Dave. I still to this day have no clue what it was about. I remember waking up on the bathroom floor trying to figure what was going on.


Around that same time I had another episode. I had left to grab some dinner at a restaurant about 5 minutes from our house.No clue what triggered it, I still only recollect bits & pieces of the drive. I got lost. Lost on a road that I traveled on a daily basis. I was terrified, crying, once again trying to figure out what was going on. By the time I got home it was dark. I had been gone for over 45 minutes, on a trip that should have taken less than 15. I have absolutely no clue what happened. It's as if my mind just blanked out.


After that I decided I needed to see a doctor. Every day life for me was becoming extremely difficult. I didn't want to leave my house, get out of bed, answer the phone. I had a panic attack sitting in my living room, over what? Walking to the end of our driveway to check the mail. I had never been so scared in my entire life, I thought I was going to die. The doctor put me on meds - anti-depressants, Xanax, & Klonopin. Wow what a cocktail right?!


Within 9 months I had maxed out my anti-depressant so he was looking into starting me on several different anti-depressants. I was on these for a year, taking the Klonopin & Xanax for my anxiety which was helping. For a year I slept at least 12 hours a day thanks to the AD, if I took a K or X then that knocked me out even earlier. I knew I couldn't live my life like that, upping my dosage every couple of months, adding more AD, I felt like a zombie. I did the worst thing anybody on these could have done. I stopped taking them cold turkey.


I felt better. Within a month I felt more like myself & my anxiety was down. *Now in no way am I saying anyone should ever stop their medications like this, it IS extremely dangerous.* My life continued, I had 2 more children, things were good. I went back to work. I was feeling great.


I had the worst episode of depression in early 2007. Worst doesn't even do it justice. I knew it was coming, I felt it. I tried everything in my power to fight it off. Like a freight train it hurled into my life & took over. I hid it, I covered it up, I did everything possible so that no one would notice it. David did. Everyone else chalked it up to the hours I was working. David & I sat down one evening in our kitchen to discuss, well, me. I told him what I was feeling. I had never felt so utterly empty in my life. I honestly felt that everyone in my life would be better off without me. My children deserved a better mother, I couldn't care for them properly. I was insufficient as a mother. I was a failure at life. I couldn't do it anymore. I woke up every. single. day irritated that I was alive & breathing. I prayed every night for God to take me home, I was tired, I was done, I didn't want to live anymore. I thought about my death every hour on the hour. I looked forward to it, had played it out in my head over a thousand times. I had the pills set up to do it. I think I shocked David with my honesty. I think I even scared him a little.


He took me to the bathroom & made me look at myself in the mirror. I didn't recognize myself. I was looking into an empty, void person. I don't remember the exact words he said but I DO remember the moment that something in me clicked. I cant tell you what it was but I had this huge crashing wave of life wash over me. Like water to a man dying in the desert, I knew if I didn't grab on to it then there was no hope. My life, my perspective, did a 180 in that moment.


It's been over 2 years since that night & I still cry when I think about it. David saved me. God lifted me up & washed away the darkness. I started anew. I look at life differently now. I find beauty in most everything. I see the lessons in every experience. I see the positive light in every situation. Negativity has no place in my life, that means I've had to make some hard decisions. I regret none of them. I'm better for it.


Now what started this thinking process you may ask. A British actress was found dead, apparent suicide. Suicides sadden my heart. I've been there, I know what they were feeling. It's the darkest of dark feelings, where it seems there's no hope. That could have been me. I could have been just another story in the paper while my family grieved my passing. Passing, I don't like that word really. It's like the angels came down & said "Hey you can continue on with life or you can pass, what you gonna choose?" "Um, I think I'll pass, thanks." Passing is like giving up. I wont give up.


I was reading an article on Bipolar Disorder the other day. Though I wasn't diagnosed with it, a lot of the article hit home. My dad has been diagnosed with being Bipolar, it's hereditary. The article said that most suicides are by people with Bipolar. I've had family members who have committed or attempted suicide on both sides of my family. My chances of being Bipolar? High. But you know what that's ok. I'll pass on the anti-depressants, the anti-psychotics, Klonopins, Xanaxs, etc. I'll use my method of keeping healthy, it's working for my dad too. I'll stay positive. I'll be proactive in life. I'll be someone I can be proud of.


There is ALWAYS Hope ♥ You just got to find it :o)

Parental Rights

Is it really so horrible to take your kids to school in your PJ's?


Apparently so, especially if you ask them.


I was wearing my comfy, warm pajamas this morning & was totally gonna wear them for the first part of the day. My daughter, Alysia, literally puts her hand out across the doorway, looks me in the eye & asks "Mom are you wearing that to take us to school?" My response "Uh yeah."


"No you're not, you'll embarrass us."
"Alysia it's just pajamas, I'm not getting out of the car."
"Mom go change seriously."
"You're gonna be late if I change."
"If you dont change I wont talk to you all week."
Hmmm now I had to think about that, Alysia. Quiet. for a WHOLE week, this could work out to my advantage :o)


Guess what I did?


I changed into clothes. Yep I broke down. I still dont see what was wrong with the PJ's. They were a white long sleeved pant set from Victoria's Secret. Oh & comfortable, so very, very comfortable.


No worries though, there will be other times when I'll get the chance to embarrass her, seeing as how this is my parental right hehehe! But I think Dave & I did enough of that while he was home. Dave was chasing me around a few aisles in Wal-Mart one day when we came back to where we left the kids with the cart Alysia's face was red & she was M.A.D. Apparently we, in our "we're being silly in love" jaunt, embarrassed her because people were watching. It was priceless & loads of fun. I can't wait to do it again so Hurry Home Dave!


Maybe I'll wear PJ's tomorrow to school hehehe!

Play Balllllll! Or Not...

The kids & I spent Saturday afternoon at my mom's. It was a gorgeous day spent outside enjoying the sun.

And the lizards :o)



Isnt he just darling?!



Well until the kids ran up & scared him.



Then there's Mr. Fatty here.

See! Look at the gut on him! Someone's eatin' good.

After we pestered the lizards we sat down to enjoy the view. It's so pretty & the horses are just down the hill there.

The kids played some ball.

Watching them run around made ME tired.

& they played until the wind picked up & a stom started brewin'.

That pretty much sums up my Saturday. I'm sure you dont wanna hear about all the arguing over the ball. Or the shrieks that ensued when the lizards moved too fast. OR the fighting in the car on the way home. Ah motherhood, it keeps you on your toes...

Sinful Delight

I have this lil obsession with biscuits, sugar, cinnamon, butter, & brown sugar.


You see first I cut my biscuits in half.



Then I coat them in cinnamon & sugar YUM!



& you put them in a Bundt pan, trust me, it works better in the Bundt pan, seriously....



You melt butter & brown sugar.... my heart skips a beat, honestly

Those gorgeous cinnamon & sugar coated biscuit halves NEED this butter poured over them, they're begging for it, dont you hear them?

Then pop them in the oven. I check on them often because well they just smell too good not to.

40 minutes later you have this Voila!

& about 3.4 seconds after it's plated I have my first bite. Absolute Heaven.

Monkey Bread is so divine that it should be a sin, in fact it probably is :o)

I hear it calling my name from the kitchen so I'm off to have my second, okay, okay, third helping. You can find the complete recipe here: http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2009/05/monkey-bread/

I may pay for gorging myself on this bread in a few years but for now I'll enjoy every scrumptious bite hehehe!

A Lil Look at Culture

I love experiencing different cultures. The food, the atmosphere, the people, it's enlightening.One of my favorites is Irish culture - the dancing, singing, food, the people's friendliness. Last weekend we got to see first hand some Irish Stepdancing. It was a lot of fun. The kids enjoyed it and decided they'd like to learn more. YAY!

We had a blast. If you ever get a chance to see Irish Stepdancing, GO! It's good for the soul ♥

Captured Beauty

Monday was a weird day with a captial WEIRD. I didnt feel well, I had a crushing headache that was dying to become a full blown migraine. I was definately not myself. Rain was on the agenda for the day & I was so sick of rain. So I spent the day tucked away, waiting for my headache to slack off. I picked up my kids from school, hit McDonalds for supper Ick!, & headed back home to die slowly on the couch. I managed to nap for a bit & when I woke up there was the most gorgeous sunset with pinks, blues, and purples. So I packed the kids up to go take some pictures.


One of the downsides to living in the city is the 5 million things in the way of a beautiful sky. The airport was our best bet for getting a clear shot. Unfortunately by the time we cruised into a parking spot the sky was beginning to darken. But here are a few of the shots that I got :o)


I love the pink in the left hand corner of this one.












The mountains in the background - I love the Blue Ridge ♥

I adore a fantastic sunset and cannot wait to get some shots at the beach :o)

Itty Ones

Take a close look & tell me what these are.



Come on! It's easy!



These are my wee baby guys(& gals) who were deposited into an egg sack at the end of Summer last year. I've been waiting FOREVER for them to hatch :o)



& here they are! YAY!

Baby spiders are extremely tiny so taking their pics while they were building their webs was tricky. They're fast lil suckers.

Now for those of you who know me, yeah I'm weird, be quiet. For those of you who dont, well lets just say I'm terrified of spiders. Yes, I've been diagnosed with arachnophobia, was on meds, the whole she-bang. Buuuuuut I'm trying to overcome that because spiders are quite fascinating. And as long as they dont move too quickly or catch me by surprise then I'm cool with them.

When my spiders made their lil spidey egg sacks last summer I was sad to see them go. Most spiders die after they lay their babies & I had grown quite attached to them. So I was mega excited to see these lil guys hangin out on my front porch ♥ & within an hour they were gone....

Now I know how Wilbur from Charlotte's Web felt......

Maybe one or two of them stuck around...

Me Ma

Me Ma *in my best impression of Mickey O'Neil from Snatch*


Mother's Day is a time to reflect on what mothers mean to us, whether they are ours biologically or in heart. I happen to love my mommy very much. She raised 2 girls on her own, even though she was married to our father for 20 years. She did her very best to make sure we had everything we needed & some of the things we wanted. She always had a job & even when she was home she was working. She never slowed down, she still doesnt :o) Even with us girls out of the house with families of our own she's still on the move, going back to school again for a bachelors degree. It certainly wont surprise me to see her continue on with her Masters. She raised us to be independent & think for ourselves. & I'm pretty sure that's exactly how my sister & I are.


I've made decisions that she didn't always agree with but she supported me anyway. She's loved me unconditionally. I hope my mothering skills equal hers. Before long I'll be living in a different state, going on my next adventure, an adventure I'd love to have her with me on. If I could pack her up & take her with me on my travels around the country I would. I know how she sees it though, if I live in a different state then that's her excuse to get out & visit me, in turn seeing the world. She's got herself a traveler's heart, must be where I get mine ♥


I love me ma. She's a good hearted, selfless woman that anyone would be proud to call Mom. But you cant cause she's Mine! :o)


Happy Mother's Day Mama! & to all the mom's out there!

Random Family

This past week has been a crazy week. I got more calls from school this week than I have all year long. Seriously it was one thing after another. Then Friday while shopping with my mom Devlan decides to take off. He was lost for about 10 minutes. This marks the first time I've ever "lost" a child & I think that's pretty darn good considering there's 4 of them & 1 of me :o) But he was safe & sound eating a lollipop that he'd grabbed off a shelf, unwrapped, & decided was his lunch. So WOW what a week. I figure I'll end this post with some pics of my kiddos. They look sweet & innocent but oh how very smart & conniving they can be :o)

Innocent? Ha! She's mouthy.

All Army All the Time

The Troublemaker, no really he's ALWAYS into something.

Dave & myself, the parents of the beloved heathens above :o)

Hope everyone has a Happy Mother's Day!! My kiddos have decided they are cooking me breakfast, that should be amusing. I cannot wait!