My Famous State of "WTF Over!"

I am presently in a strange state of mind. The deployment will be underway in less than a handful of days. Somehow it went from months to DAYS. I'm doing....hell I don't know how I'm doing. On the brink of an emotional breakdown one second & happily in denial the next. I cannot believe I'm dealing with this crap again. I hate not having control over my emotions so I push them aside to deal with later, whenever later comes, usually in the form of spontaneous tears or a panic attack. Have I mentioned I hate this?

The kids seem to be doing fine. They're a lil upset that Halloween is pretty much screwed. The kids are usually fine until D-day & the weeks after then we get back into our routine & move through life regardless. They are quite resilient creatures & it helps me to remember to be like them :o)

In other news, Dave & I widened out our flower bed in front of the house. I had plans to plant some new bulbs & such but I'm not sure I'll get them in the ground in time. I may wait until Spring. I'm trying to decide whether to start making my yellow ribbons now or if I should wait until he leaves. Just a few days difference but still :oP I need to get a headstart on the ribbons I'll be putting on our Christmas tree this year. It may also help if I BUY a tree too. Maybe if I buy one early enough I won't pay a fortune for one.

I need to finish decorating the house, frame some of my photos, homey it up a bit more. There's a few pieces of furniture left to buy, nothing big just a couple of nightstands, maybe some new mattresses for the boys, & a dresser for Brendan's room. Alysia's cheerleading will start in December. I'm going to see if there's anything I can get the boys in come the first of next year. Brendan doesn't want to do basketball, that's what they're taking signups for now. But he IS interested in Track & Field, maybe come February he'll be in that. Alysia wants to do gymnastics. Camden may want to play football or T-ball. Devlan's up for anything as usual lol! So in all, I have things to keep us busy. It's still gonna be one long ass year *sigh*

Even with our lives continuing on as usual, busy lil bees we are, there will always be the emotional/mental havoc running rampant in the backs of our minds, rearing they're ugly heads when they see fit. Unfortunately that is a deployment fact.